“They” say this is the “most wonderful time of the year.”

For the most part, “they” are correct.  Our lives leave what is routine, and we focus upon holiday magic, and doing for others, and enjoying the company of friends and family.

Sometimes, however, “they” can be wrong.

This post is a tribute to two Real New Yorkers who met untimely deaths.  They did not know each other.  Their common bond is that each lost his life during the holiday season.

Dr. S was the best physician I ever had.  He was raised in the South and his Upper East Side practice was run a bit like a country doctor’s.  He was practical, hands-on and listened. Barely middle-aged, he was athletic and fit.  He rode a motorcycle to work.

When he and his wife came to New York, years ago, they started a healthcare clinic for the poor on the Lower East Side.  They ministered to the sick and needy, and Dr. S also did his work at Lenox Hill and tended the garden of his private practice, steps from the Guggenheim.

Last year, Dr. S and his wife went on a much-needed vacation in Costa Rica.  One day, he went for a swim, while his wife stayed on the wild, unspoiled and uninhabited beach.  Dr. S got caught in a rip current and, try as he might, he could not make it to shore.

Last holiday season, Dr. S drowned.

I can still picture him in his office, sleeves rolled up, keying my test results into his laptop and admonishing me about my weight.

He was a Real New Yorker because he came here determined to make a life and to make his mark upon the world.  He worked hard, played hard and gave a helping hand.

The second remembrance of a Real New Yorker is — I mean, was — a good 20 years Dr. S’s junior.  He was born in Manhattan and was raised in Brooklyn, a Real New Yorker by birth.  I knew his parents well. They were neighbors in the Park Slope co-op we lived in for 17 years.

N. was a preternaturally gifted writer.  He endured the competitive pressure-cooker of Stuyvesant High School and was barely out of his teens when his first book was published.  He was hailed as the voice of a generation and beloved by legions of YA fans, kids who swore that the emotions he captured were their’s.  This gifted artist tapped into the mainline of today’s teen angst. There were books, screenplays, films and, now, TV scripts.  N. moved to Los Angeles.

But his talent had a price tag: he suffered from depression for years.  Last week, he killed himself in a most gruesome way.  I simply cannot imagine what demons it takes to cause one to deliberately head to the roof of a 13 story apartment building, your parents’ home, look down at the concrete below, and let yourself fall those dizzying seconds.

Two lives, connected only by the time of year of their deaths.  Of course, the game of life is that we all know that, someday and somehow, we will die. Which is why it is so hard for me to waste time — “it’s like throwing money in the gutter,” as my grandmother would have said.

Dr. S and N. are gone from this earth, but not from my memory.  I am left here to ponder their promise, now unfulfilled, and to remember not to waste a single moment.
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One man is gone, doing what he loved best, living his passion.  The other, a young man, is also gone, lost traversing the foothills of his life, and tortured by an inner pain so severe that just one more day on earth was an unbearable, impossible, burden.

Yitgadal v’yitkadash sh’mei raba.

B’alma di v’ra chirutei,
v’yamlich malchutei,
b’chayeichon uv’yomeichon
uv’chayei d’chol beit Yisrael,
baagala uviz’man kariv. V’im’ru: Amen.

Y’hei sh’mei raba m’varach
l’alam ul’almei almaya.

Yitbarach v’yishtabach v’yitpaar
v’yitromam v’yitnasei,
v’yit’hadar v’yitaleh v’yit’halal
sh’mei d’kud’sha b’rich hu,
l’eila min kol birchata v’shirata,
tushb’chata v’nechemata,
daamiran b’alma. V’imru: Amen.

Y’hei sh’lama raba min sh’maya,
v’chayim aleinu v’al kol Yisrael.
V’imru: Amen.

Oseh shalom bimromav,
Hu yaaseh shalom aleinu,
v’al kol Yisrael. V’imru: Amen.

The Real New Yorkers welcomes Bill de Blasio and his family to the NYC mayoralty.

Bill comes from my former neighborhood, Park Slope, and has lived there since well before tykes carelessly tossed $850 Burberry jackets to the floor of the playground at PS 321, and left them there, without a care.

To me, this is a story about the incremental change needed — now — to improve our city.  Real New Yorkers know that, once upon a time, it was the East Side and a few other enclaves where the uber-rich could be found.

Now?  NYC is largely a richy-rich world.  The non-rich are getting pushed out.  No, strike that.  Steamrolled out.  The prevailing attitude has been:”hey, if you can’t afford to live here, get the eff out.  And stay out!”

Real New Yorkers need to be able to live in their own city. Young adults from around the country, and energetic go-getters from all over the world need to be able to make New York their home.

Mayors can do only so much.  This is understood.  But by changing the dialogue, by recalibrating the tonality, many disinfranchised NY’ers can again feel like they at least have a fighting chance.

The ongoing decrease of crime in this city continues to impress, especially when marked against other cities such as Chicago, LA, Houston, DC, Detroit and Baltimore.  Kudos to the NYPD and the community policing approach first started many years ago under David Dinkins, who initially hired Ray Kelly.  A tweaking of stop and frisk will not ruin the quality of life in this city.  Instead, it will improve it, since the numbers show that the policy does nothing but clog up the system with unnecessary collars.

For all of Bloomberg’s vaunted managerial and entrepreneurial expertise, he kicked the contract can down the road and left a blow-out-the-doors, $2 billion deficit ahead.  What’s more, his tin ear got the goat of Real New Yorkers.  Kathy Black as school chancellor? Seriously?

And yes, let’s talk about schools, since Bloomberg said, way back when, that his mayoralty would ultimately be judged on the state of the schools when he left.  After upping the budgets and getting metric-centric, the kids are still flailing.  They were taught to pass tests, not “learn.”  There’s plenty of work to be done to improve the education level of our kids in our public schools, and if it takes an incremental increase on top earners’ income taxes, so be it.

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Today’s question, from Brooklyn:

Dear Real New Yorkers,

What tips can you provide on how to celebrate Labor Day?

Best Regards,

Perplexed in Park Slope

Dear Perplexed,

No need for confusion.  There’s no reason to buy petrochemicals and drive in heavy traffic, or go to crowded beaches or noisy parades.

All you have to do is think — about two words: Labor Movement.

Society is built upon the back of labor.  Yours.  Mine.  His.  Hers.  Real New Yorkers understand that, as a key portal for immigration to the U.S., our city was, is and always will be instrumental in providing the physical and intellectual strength needed to keep this country humming.  And, as we know — or should know — the U.S. consumer economy is a key driver of the world’s economy.

The bravery of the labor movement, born on our streets, resulted in a powerful middle class that created an unparalleled standard of living.  Now, today, many politicians believe there is currency in denigrating labor.  They claim that the modest remuneration of civil service workers is the cause of broken budgets.  They claim that teachers — TEACHERS, FOR GOD’S SAKE!!! — make too much money and have caused the collapse of our once-enviable public school system.

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Instead, a considered comment might be: “Hey, we deserve that type of package too — we’re holding down the fort for three fired co-workers, and now they cut my hours so I’m not entitled to healthcare benefits anymore!”

For the reality is, when the middle class makes more money, people buy more goods and services and pay more taxes.  And that, Perplexed, floats everyone’s boat.

Even the one-percenters howling at the moon over the (stagnated) minimum wage and the need for a few measly sick days a year.

I am reminded that Woody Guthrie lived in Coney Island for a time.  He came from Oklahoma, but he ended up a Real New Yorker.  His song, Tom Joad (based upon Steinbeck’s epic The Grapes of Wrath) tells a story worth noting and noting well on Labor Day.  http://www.woodyguthrie.org/Lyrics/Tom_Joad.htm

Now, Perplexed, if you really want to get your dander up, about today’s labor inequities, give a listen to this performance by Springsteen and Tom Morello, on Springsteen’s homage to Guthrie’s song, The Ghost of Tom Joad. Consider Bruce’s opening remarks as he intros this song. http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=JChuUgio_8g

After watching it, I think you’ll know better what you should be doing and thinking this Labor Day.

Best,

The Real New Yorkers Speak

Welcome to The Real New Yorkers Speak.  This will be a regular feature on topics of the day.  No holds barred.  Any New York-centric topic is fair game.

Today’s question:

Dear The Real New Yorkers Speak:

I am a registered Democrat and the mayoral primaries are coming up tout de suite.  Who should I vote for?

The Real New Yorkers Answers:

Good question.  Here’s how I look at it:

• Weiner: Anthony, Anthony, Anthony…what are we going to do with you? I had thought you were on the right side of the issues, I had thought you were a contender but, alas, you have serious emotional problems.  These days, the NYC mayor has to deal with both pothole issues and be an international ambassador and be a big-picture guy.  Do you really want this, this person representing Real New Yorkers on the global stage?  Once you’ve become the butt of the late night comedians’ jokes, you’re no longer viable.  Next….
• Quinn: Ah, the mighty Quinn.  All the media training and soft, cuddly feature stories can’t whitewash who you really are, what you really did, and what you’re likely to do if elected.  If you would have voted for a fourth Bloomberg term, she’s definitely your candidate. But if you’re a Real New Yorker, move on…
• Thompson: Four years ago, Thompson nearly toppled mini-Mike, despite sleepwalking through his campaign and being outspent by Bloomberg about a gazillion to one.  I think I like the guy, I really do.  But in the first debate, he came off so…so…so…dull.  If he’s capable of amping it up, he better start soon.  So far, I give him a grade of ZZZZZ.
• De Blasio: Ok, I’m trying hard to ignore the fact that the PC patrol, such as Susan Sarandon, is coming out for Bill. I heard great things about him, from people who I respect and who are in the know.  But I wasn’t sure.  Then, I saw him in action at the first debate.  Hmmm.  He impressed.  He was the only adult on the stage, the only one with his lights on.  Weiner flailed.  Thompson failed.  Quinn parroted the key message points her handlers drilled into her big doughy head.  But De Blasio?  I think he’s a player, I think he’s a mensch and I think he can make a difference after 12 years of megalomania.  Now, does he have a chance against, say, a Joe Llohta?  Stay tuned.

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Over to you, Real New Yorkers.  What do you think?

They laughed when developers began buying up brownstone shells in Harlem in the early 2000s.  They laughed when Roberta’s opened in Bushwick.  They laughed when big $ hotels opened on Fourth Avenue in Park Slope.

So check this out: The Opera House Hotel opens in the South Bronx.

http://www.welcome2thebronx.com/wordpress/2013/08/16/first-luxury-hotel-the-opera-house-opens-in-the-bronx/?subscribe=success#blog_subscription-2
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Hmmm?  Along with residential newcomers to the southern end of the Grand Concourse, methinks there’s something afoot here on The Mainland (the Bronx).  Check it out.  Could be the bad old days are finally fading.

Our advice and opinion column — The Real New Yorkers Speak — will debut here next Wednesday.

We’ll cover topics of interest to all Real New Yorkers, from food & entertainment to housing to child rearing.

Tune in every Wednesday for audacious commentary on lifestyles in the five boroughs.  And, because this is YOUR column, feel free to send your topic suggestions.

See you next Wednesday!
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The Real New Yorkers

The City of New York has a whole new population of recently minted citizens.  They love it here, intend to stay and raise kids here, and want to build their careers here. And yet, in some important ways, these New “Real New Yorkers” are very different from the Real New Yorkers of generations past.

Today’s Real New Yorkers ride the subways day and night.  They are not afraid and, why should they be?  They never experienced yesteryear’s subways: sad, hot, tagged Redbirds, with only a door or two that worked.  And, what’s more, they don’t care about the bad old days, either.  The fact that their train did not derail or catch on fire today is no big deal:

http://www.nytimes.com/2013/07/23/nyregion/mta-ponders-transit-for-a-new-generation.html?ref=nyregion

Today’s Real New Yorkers are young and tech-savvy, full of energy.  They don’t care for cars, ride bikes everywhere, and embrace mass transit.  Importantly, they grew up with electronic devices that put 1960s era, NASA-level computing power in their shirt pocket. They want to know: when’s the next train coming?  Why can’t I get Wi-Fi?  Why doesn’t my Smart Phone work down here?  What’s with these MTA neanderthals?

Both of these kinds viagra online click to find out are prescribed by doctors. Yes, according to pop culture, a vacuum pump is nothing more than cheap joke or toilet humor, but for people with ED, it could also mean you purchase cialis online failed in your approach horribly. While it is said that in most cases of erectile dysfunction viagra viagra visit here take place due to the exaggerated even wrong advertising on chronic prostatitis from some irresponsible and irregular medical institutes, many people are convinced of a idea that chronic proatatitis will develop infertility. To tadalafil without rx be honest, there is an assumption that the search will become more close to what Bing is offering. Some short stories, such as those in my recent collection, Home Front, put today’s New Real New Yorker into my time machine and back to the scary Days of Decline here in New York. Such tales are an eye opener for some.

But then, the story is read, the time travel is over and it’s back to today’s reality.  Rather than asking, “If I get on this train at 2 a.m., will this be the day that I die?” they wonder: Why doesn’t my station have a countdown clock? as they sip complex Fair Trade coffee orders and flick the pages of their iPads.

Me?  I’m just thrilled that the a/c works and I can see out the graffiti-less windows. Working a/c, on a New York City subway car.  Imagine that!

Summer’s here and the time is right, for…well, sure, dancing in the streets but, also, curling up poolside with a good book.

What is this Real New Yorker reading this summer?  Well, other than re-reading that soon-to-be-classic, Home Front (available at your favorite online booksellers), I’m reading:

• Anne Proulx, Close Range: Wyoming Stories (almost finished.  Wow!)
• Transatlantic: Colum McCann (loved Let the Great World Spin, so this s/b a winner too)
• The Round House: Louise Erdrich (heard such great things about it)
• The Yellow Birds: Kevin Powers (ditto)
• The Murmuring Deep: Reflections on the Biblical Unconscious, by Avivah Zornberg (What?  You never read any of Zornberg’s books?  She’s at the intersection of religion, psychology, philosophy, anthropology, literature — with a heapin’ helpin’ of her unique “special sauce.”)
• The I.L. Peretz Reader (keepin’ it real)

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The “Silent Majority” sobriquet came into wide use in 1969.  Nixon’s speech in November of that year called out to the “great silent majority of my fellow Americans…”

He, Nixon, was referring to that wide swath of Americans for the Vietnam war and against the counterculture at the time.  The idea was that these were people with beliefs that were overshadowed or out-amplified by protesters, and the news coverage they generated.  The so-called Silent Majority, it was believed, was not involved in the public discourse.

We have, today, a situation where – IMHO – a great majority of Americans agree on what is right, and what is wrong, and yet is being out-shouted by louder groups garnering out-sized media share-of-voice.

The difference is that, this time, the louder forces are, politically, on the far right, and the Silent Majority is more moderate.

The New Silent Majority, I believe, has a heart and real American values.  This is a group willing to listen to another’s point of view, that doesn’t see life as a zero-sum game (for me to “win” you must “lose”).

Here is what the New Silent Majority says on some key issues of the day:

•  The Economy: we need jobs.  Our kids need jobs.  We want to work.  Why are we not focused on job creation?  What is the purpose of sequestration, at this painful time?
• Healthcare Reform: We need affordable healthcare coverage.  Now.  Our kids are sick and need medical care and coverage is costing me $1,500 a month.  My teeth hurt and I haven’t been to a dentist in 15 years.
• Congress: Get your heads screwed on straight and start moving forward on…anything! And if I turn on the TV next Sunday and see Lindsey Graham on a talk show one more time, my head’s going to explode.  Get into a back room, lock the door and don’t come out until something gets done.
• The Military: Our men and women are the bravest, toughest group anywhere on the planet, and they’re exhausted. We need to reboot our thinking.  We’re not the world’s police anymore.
• Medicare: Here’s a program that works fine.  All my older relatives are on Medicare.  Wish I had it.
• Social Security: I paid into Social Security my entire working life and now they want to move the goal posts on me?  Social Security is not a handout.  I paid for it.
• Education: Our children need the best education possible to compete.  Why are school budgets being cut?
• Social Issues: Gay rights?  Abortion?  That’s all private family business, not fair game for legislation.
• Immigration Reform: See my thoughts on Congress, above.  Let’s get moving.  My forefathers didn’t exactly come over on the Mayflower.  Why are we stalling this out yet again?

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The sad truth is that the “us-versus-them” binary thinking of the hard Right is a product of mass communication, which gives giant media megaphones to every pipsqueak.  Real New Yorkers, I urge you to travel around the country.  You’ll be amazed.  Most folks – the New Silent Majority – are friendly, fair-minded and hospitable.   We all bleed red blood and most people I know are quick to help their neighbors in time of need.  But the shrill magpies that pass for journalists prefer to keep the heat up, the battle sides drawn.

No doubt, there are those who agree with the magpies and remain steadfast in their intransigence.

Trust me on this, however: there is a New Silent Majority out there.  It is gathering power, like a tropical storm passing warm waters, picking up energy.  It is getting ready to break the logjam that prevents our country from moving forward, as it should – and as it has in the past.

Think: in our current state of stasis, could you imagine an Interstate highway system being built?  Could you imagine a space program, or a power grid, or anything that required bold vision, clarity, determination?

The New Silent Majority is out there, lurking.  It’s been quiet for a long time.  My question to today’s leaders: are you willing to bet it will remain quiet come 2014?

According to Senator James Inhofe of Oklahoma, his state’s tornado tragedy is deserving of significant and immediate Federal disaster relief.  President Obama promised he’ll provide “whatever it takes…”  No questions were asked, or conditions required.

Funny, but I seem to recall him saying, just months ago, that disaster relief requests for Hurricane Sandy victims were full of pork, wasteful, and heart-tuggingly manipulative.  Yes, that’s what the Senator from Oklahoma and his moron partner, Tom Coburn, reaffirmed just the other day.

http://www.salon.com/2013/05/21/inhofe_and_coburn_red_state_hypocrites/

Ah, now I understand.  Silly me. We have virtuous disasters and bogus disasters, according to Inhofe.  Oklahoma’s tragedy, from a state that gets an out-sized proportion of Federal relief dollars (from that evil entity BIG GOVERNMENT) is deserving — so hurry up and cut that check.  But last December, after months of sitting on their thumbs, Inhofe and other red state pols casually picked apart Sandy relief requests like pulled pork at an Oklahoma Sunday BBQ.
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What do you say, Real New Yorkers?  I know what I say, to any politician that holds up or puts subjective conditions on funds that help Americans caught in a tragedy:  “Honey child: kiss my grits!”